Valium

I wish there was a way to scream in here. If I could, I would scream that your every breath used to be a gift and that your heart used to be so loud I couldn't hear the beat and that I used to want to live inside of it and I don't know how to carry this anymore, I don't know how to carry my heart, but I keep doing it, I keep stumbling around, I keep breathing, I keep opening my eyes and closing them again, but I can assure you that I don't want to anymore. Everything will always reside with you. And everything of yours used to reside with me. I will never be able to grasp why it isn't like that anymore. We knew each other. We knew each other. And you left that. You left it for... Something different. Your sheets and slates are clean. You could start anew. Leave it behind. Find something better. I can't. I know there is nothing like what you were, like what we were. And so there is no reason and there is no hope.

~

sometimes your love, it's so pretty
I just wanna sink in
and sometimes your heart looks so pretty
I just wanna live there
oh, I wish I could bottle it up
and breathe it back like valium
and sometimes your heart looks so pretty
I just wanna live there

and so, when I find a scientist to help me
and if I meet the maker of all the universe
I'll ask them why we're here and what we're here for
and I'll tell them all the stories about our little world

oh, I've been waiting
oh, I've been waiting

sometimes your love, it's so quiet
I don't even need to speak
and sometimes your heart, it's so loud
I can't even hear the beat
well, I wish I could bottle it up
and breathe it back like valium
sometimes your heart, it's so quiet
and I don't even need to speak

well, I'll find a scientist to help me
and if I meet the maker of all the universe
I'll ask him why we're here and what we're here for
and I'll tell them all the stories about our little world

oh, I've been waiting
oh, I've been waiting
oh, I've been waiting
oh, I've been waiting

oh, I wish I could bottle it up
oh, I wish I could bottle it up
oh, I wish I could bottle it up
and breathe it back like valium