Here with me

I miss you.

~

I didn't hear you leave
I wonder, how am I still here?
I don't want to move a thing
it might change my memory

oh, I am what I am
I'll do what I want
but I can't hide

I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
until you're resting here with me
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
until you're resting here with me

I don't want to call my friends
they might wake me from this dream
and I can't leave this bed
risk forgetting all that's been

oh, I am what I am
I'll do what I want
but I can't hide

I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
until you're resting here with me
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
until you're resting here with me

- Dido

Call me call me

~

I close my eyes and I keep seeing things
rainbow waterfalls, sunny liquid dreams
confusion creeps inside me, raining doubt
got to get to you, but I don't know how

call me, call me
let me know it's all right
call me, call me
don't you think it's 'bout time?

please, won't you call and
ease my mind?
reasons for me to find you?
peace of mind
what can I do
to get me to you?

I had your number quite some time ago
back when we were young, but I had to grow
ten thousand years I've searched, it seems, and now
got to get to you, won't you tell me how?

call me, call me
let me know you are there
call me, call me
I wanna know you still care

come on now, won't you
ease my mind?
reasons for me to find you?
peace of mind
what can I do
to get me to you?

come one now, won't you ease my mind?
reasons for me to find you?
peace of mind
reasons for living my life?
ease my mind
reasons for me to know you?
peace of mind
what can I do
to get me to you?

The sore feet song (the best sleepy-song ever)

~

I walked ten thousand miles, ten thousand miles to see you
and every gasp of breath, I grabbed it just to find you
I climbed up every hill to get to you
I wandered ancient lands to hold just you

and every single step of the way, I pay
and every single night and day, I searched for you
through sandstorms and hazy dawns, I reached for you

I stole ten thousand pounds, ten thousand pounds to see you
I robbed convenience stores 'cause I thought they'd make it easier
I lived off rats and toads and I starved for you
I fought of giant bears and I killed them too

and every single step of the way, I pay
and every single night and day, I searched for you
through sandstorms and hazy dawns, I reached for you
I'm tired and I'm weak, but I'm strong for you
I wanna go home, but my love gets me through

- Ally Kerr/Mushishi

The Greatest

once I wanted to be the greatest
no wind or waterfall could stall me
and then came the rush of the flood
the stars at night turned deep to dust

melt me down, into big black armour
leave no trace of grace, just in your honour
lower me down to culprit south
make 'em wash a space in town
for the lead and the dregs of my bed
I've been sleeping
lower me down
pin me in
secure the grounds
for the later parade

once, I wanted to be the greatest
two fists of solid rock
with brains that could explain any feeling
lower me down
pin me in
secure the grounds
for the lead and the dregs of my bed
I've been sleeping
for the later parade

once, I wanted to be the greatest
no wind or waterfall could stall me
and then came the rush of the flood
the stars at night turned deep to dust

- Cat Power

Lullaby

I know that you can not be here
I know that you are not mine now
looking out the window
at another window
I see toenails changing colour
like the leaves of fall

if you often smile, but often don't smile
which do you do more often? smile or not?
I dreamt the hydrant
was covered in snow
white light glowing below

I know that you can not be here
I know that you are not mine now
looking out the window
at another window
I see toenails changing colour
like the leaves of fall

- Regina Spektor

1000 Oceans

This song is precious to me. It means something to me that don't think I can explain to anyone. I've never really dared to try. If you ask me to explain what it means in simple terms, then I would tell you that it means everything. And the video is just... complete heartbreak. And so important. Draws me in and tears me up every time I see it.

~

these tears I've cried
I've cried a thousand oceans
and if it seems
I'm floating in the darkness, well

I can't believe that I would keep
keep you from flying
and I would cry a thousand more
if that's what it takes
to sail you home
sail you home
sail you home

I'm aware what the rules are
but you know that I will run
you know that I will follow you
over Silbury Hill
through the solar field
you know that I will follow you

and if I find you
will you still remember?
playing at the trains
or does this little blue ball just fade away?

over Silbury Hill
through the solar field
you know that I will follow you
I'm aware what the rules are
but you know that I will run
you know that I will follow you

these tears I've cried
I've cried a thousand oceans
and if it seems
I'm floating in the darkness, well

I can't believe that I would keep
keep you from flying
so I will cry a thousand more
if that's what it takes
to sail you home
sail you home
sail you home

Cut here

"so we meet again," and I offer my hand
all dry and english slow
and you look at me and I understand
yeah, it's a look I used to know

"three long years and your favourite man,
is that any way to say hello?"
and you hold me
like you'll never let me go
like you'll never let me go

"oh, come on and have a drink with me,
sit down and talk a while,"
"oh, I wish I could... and I will,
but now I just don't have the time,"
and over my shoulder as I walk away
I see you give that look goodbye
I still see that look in your eye

so dizzy, mr. busy
too much rush to talk to Billy
all the silly, frilly things have to first get done
in a minute, sometime soon
maybe next time, make it June
until later doesn't always come

it's so hard to think it ends sometime
and this could be the last
I should really hear you sing again
I should really watch you dance
because it's hard to think
I'll never get another chance
to hold you
to hold you

but chilly, mr. dilly
too much rush to talk to Billy
all the tizzy frizzy idiot things must get done
in a second, just hang on
all in good time, won't be long
until later

I should have stopped to think
I should have made the time
I could have had that drink
I could have talked a while
I would have done it right
I would have moved us on
but I didn't, now it's all too late
it's over, and you're gone

I miss you, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you
I miss you so much

but how many times can I walk away?
I wish, if only
how many times can I talk this way?
I wish, if only
keep on making the same mistake
keep on aching the same heartbreak
I wish, if only
but "if only" is a wish too late

- The Cure

Bink's sake

~

yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho

going to deliver Bink's sake
following the seabreeze
riding on the waves
far across the salty depths
the merry evening sun
painting circles in the sky
birds, singing along

farewell to the harbor
to my old hometown
let's all sing out with a "DON!"
as the ship sets sail
waves of gold and silver
dissolve into salty spray
as we all set sail to
the ends of the sea

going to deliver Bink's sake
we are pirates, sailing through the sea
the waves are our pillows
the ship, our roost
flying the proud skull
on our flags and on our sails

now comes a storm
through the far off sky
now the waves are dancing
beat upon the drums
if you loose your nerve
this could be your last breath
but if you just hold on
the morning sun will rise

yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho

going to deliver Bink's sake
today and tomorrow
our dreams through the night
waving our goodbyes
we'll never meet again
but don't look so down
for at night, the moon will rise

going to deliver Bink's sake
let's all sing it with a "DON!"
a song of the waves
doesn't matter who you are
someday, you'll just be bones
never ending, ever wandering
our funny travelling tale

yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho
yo-hohoho, yo-hohoho

Yellow

The salty spray of a wild, blue sea.

~

look at the stars
look how they shine for you
and everything you do
yeah, they were all yellow

I came along
I wrote a song for you
and all the things you do
and it was called "yellow"

so then I took my turn
oh, what a thing to have done
and it was all yellow

your skin
oh yeah, your skin and bones
turn into something beautiful
and you know
you know I love you so
you know I love you so

I swam across
I jumped across for you
oh, what a thing to do
'cause you were all yellow

I drew a line
I drew a line for you
oh, what a thing to do
and it was all yellow

your skin
oh yeah, your skin and bones
turn into something beautiful
and you know
for you, I'd bleed myself dry
for you, I'd bleed myself dry

it's true
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you

look at the stars
look how they shine for you
and all the things that you do

- Coldplay

Dance me to the end of love

This is a song of lifelong love. I wish I could include the video here. It's so beautiful. But embing was disabled by request - at least that's what youtube said. So I'll only be able to share the lyrics, and whoever wants to see the video for themselves will have to go on a little treasure hunt. Which won't be very hard. Not with youtube out there.

~

dance me to your beauty
with a burning violin
dance me through the panic
'til I'm gathered safely in
lift me like an olive branch
and be my homeward dove
dance me to the end of love
dance me to the end of love

let me see your beauty
when the witnesses are gone
let me feel you moving
like they do in Babylon
show me, slowly what I
only know the limits of
dance me to the end of love
dance me to the end of love

dance me to the wedding, now
dance me on and on
dance me very tenderly
and dance me very long
we're both of us beneath our love
we're both of us above
dance me to the end of love
dance me to the end of love

dance me to the children
who are asking to be born
dance me through the curtains
that our kisses have outworn
raise a tent of shelter now
though every thread is torn
dance me to the end of love
dance me to the end of love

dance me to your beauty
with a burning violin
dance me through the panic
'til I'm gathered safely in
touch me with your naked hand
or touch me with your glove
dance me to the end of love

- Leonard Cohen

Støv

"...Hvert atom av meg og hvert atom av deg... Vi skal leve i fugler og blomster og øyenstikkere og furutrær og skyer og i de små lysflekkene du ser anse i solstrålene... Og når de bruker atomene våre til å lage nye liv av, får de ikke bare ta ett, nei, de blir nødt til å bruke to, ett fra deg og ett fra meg, for så tett sammen kommer vi til å sitte..."

- Den Mørke Materien, bok 3: "En Kikkert av Rav"

Marsipan

"(...) Jeg var en gang nonne, skjønner du. Jeg trodde det var mulig å drive med fysikk til Guds ære, til det gikk opp for meg at det finnes ingen Gud, og at fysikk var mye mer interessant, uansett. Den kristne religionen er ret og slett en fryktelig mektig og overbevisende feiltakelse."

"Når holdt du opp å være nonne?"

"Jo, det husker jeg presis. Til og med klokkeslettet. Fordi jeg var flink i fysikk, lot de meg få avslutte fysikkutdannelsen min, og jeg var ferdig med doktorgraden og skulle begynne å undervise. Det var ikke en av de ordenene hvor de stenger seg ute fra verden. Faktisk brukte vi ikke nonnedrakt engang. Det var nok at vi kledde oss sobert og gikk med krusifiks. Så jeg skulle undervise på universitetsnivå og drive forskning i partikkelfysikk. Og så skulle det holdes en fagkongress, og de ba meg komme og holde et foredrag. Kongressen var i Lisboa, og der hadde jeg aldri vært før. Sant å si hadde jeg aldri vært utenfor England. Hele greia - flyturen, hotellet, det sterke solskinnet, de fremmede språkene som summet rundt meg, de kjente menneskene som skulle tale, og tanken på mitt eget foredrag, og undringen på om det kom til å komme noen, eller om jeg ville bli for nervøs til å få sagt et ord... Å, jeg skal si jeg var på tærne av opphisselse, ja.

Og jeg var jo så uskyldig - husk dét. Jeg hadde alltid vært snill liten pike. Hadde gått regelmessig til messe, hadde trodd jeg hadde et kall til det åndelige liv. Av hele mitt hjerte ville jeg tjene Gud. Jeg ville ta hele mitt liv og holde det frem - slik," sa hun og holdt frem begge hendene samlet, "og legge det foran Jesus og la ham gjøre med det som han ville. Og så var jeg vel nokså tilfreds med meg selv, skulle jeg tro. Altfor tilfreds. Jeg var hellig og attpå til flink. Ha! Det varte til, å, til klokken halv ti om kvelden den tiende august for syv år siden.

Det var kvelden etter at jeg hadde holdt foredraget mitt. Og det gikk bra, og det var noen kjente mennesker blant publikum, og jeg hadde taklet spørsmålrunden uten å snuble altfor ofte, så jeg var kort og godt full av lettelse og glede... og stolthet, ganske sikkert. Men i hvert fall, så var det noen av kollegene mine som skulle på en restaurant et stykke nedover kysten, og de spurte om jeg ville bli med. Normalt ville jeg funnet på en unnskyldning, men denne gangen tenkte jeg at vel, jeg er da en voksen kvinne, jeg har nettopp holdt et foredrag om et viktig tema, og det er blitt godt mottat, og jeg er blant venner... Og det var så varmt, og det folk snakket om, var alt jeg var mest interessert i, og vi var alle i godt humør, så jeg tenkte jeg kunne løsne litt på snippen. Husk, her oppdaget jeg en ny side av meg selv, en som likte smaken av vin og grillede sardiner og følelsen av varm luft mot huden og rytmen av musikken i bakgrunnen. Jeg nøt det.

Så vi satte oss ute i hagen. Det var et langbord, og jeg satt for enden, under et sitrontre, og ved siden av meg var det et slags lysthus med pasjonsblomster, og bordkavaleren min snakket med en på den andre siden av bordet og... Vel, midt i mot meg satt det en mann jeg hadde sett et par ganger under konferansen. Jeg kjente ham ikke; vi hadde ikke hilst ordentlig. Han var italiener, hadde levert noen arbeider folk hadde snakket om, og jeg tenkte det kunne være interessant å høre mer om det. Men i hvert fall. Han var bare litt eldre enn meg, med bløtt, svart hår, nydelig olivenbrun hud og mørke, mørke øyne. Luggen hans hadde det med å falle ned over pannen, og han strøk den på plass igjen, sånn, langsomt..."

Hun viste dem det.

"Han var ikke pen," sa hun. "Ingen damevenn eller sjarmør. Hadde han vært det, hadde jeg blitt sjenert og ikke ant hva jeg skulle si til ham. Men han var hyggelig og gløgg og morsom, og det var det enkleste i verden å sitte der i lykteskjøret under sitrontreet med blomsterduften og grillmaten og vinen og prate og le og merke at jeg håpet han syntes jeg var pen. Jeg flørtet! Hva med løftet mitt? Hva med å vie livet til Jesus og alt det? Vel, jeg vet ikke om det var vinen eller min egen tåpelighet eller den varme luften eller sitrontreet eller hva... Men gradvis begynte jeg å få følelsen av at jeg hadde lurt meg selv til å tro noe som ikke var sant. Jeg hadde fått meg selv til å tro at jeg var glad og lykkelig og tilfreds alene, at jeg ikke trengte noen andres kjærlighet. Å bli forelsket var som Kina: Man vet at det er der, og det er sikkert veldig interessant, og noen mennesker drar dit, men aldri jeg. Jeg kom til å tilbringe et helt liv uten å dra til Kina, men det gjorde ingenting, for jeg hadde jo hele resten av verden å dra til. Og så var det noen som rakte meg noe søtt, og plutselig gikk det opp for meg at jeg hadde vært i Kina. For å si det sånn. Og glemt det. Det var smaken av det søte som minnet meg på det - marsipan, tror jeg det var. Men i hvert fall, så husket jeg smaken, og med ett var jeg tilbake der jeg smakte det den første gangen som pike.

Jeg var tolv år. Jeg var i et selskap hos en venninne, bursdagsselskap, og det var disco. Som regel må jentene danse sammen, for guttene er for sjenerte til å by dem opp. Men der var det en gutt - en jeg ikke kjente - som spurte om jeg ville danse, og så danset vi den første dansen, og så den andre, og da hadde vi begynt å prate... Og dere vet hvordan det er når man liker noen, man vet det straks, og - ja, jeg likte ham virkelig ordentlig. Og vi fortsatte å prate, og så kom bursdagskaken. Og han tok en bit marsipan og stakk den forsiktig i munnen på meg - jeg husker jeg prøvde å smile, samtidig som jeg rødmet of følte meg så dum - og så ble jeg forelsket i ham bare for dét, bare for den forsiktige måten han rørte leppene mine på med den marsipanen.

Og jeg tror det var i det selskapet, eller kanskje det var i et annet, at vi kysset hverandre for første gang. Det var i en hage, og det strømmet musikk ut innenfra, og mellom trærne var det så stille og kjølig, og jeg verket - hele kroppen min verket etter ham, og jeg kunne merke at han hadde det på samme måten. Og begge var nesten for sjenerte til å gjøre noe som helst. Nesten. Men en av oss gjorde det, og så, uten noen som helst overgang - det var som et kvantesprang, momentant - kysset vi hverandre og - å, det var mer enn Kina, det var paradiset. Vi traff hverandre fem-seks ganger, ikke mer. Da flyttet foreldrene hans, og jeg har aldri sett ham siden. Det var så skjønn en tid, og så kort... Men den hadde vært. Jeg hadde opplevd det. Jeg hadde vært i kina.

Og klokken halv ti om kvelden ved det restaurantbordet i Portugal, var det noen som ga meg et stykke marsipan, og alt sammen kom tilbake til meg. Og jeg tenkte: Skal jeg virkelig leve hele resten av mitt liv uten noensinne å føle det igjen? Jeg tenkte: Jeg vil til Kina. Det er fullt av skatter og fremmedartethet og mysterier og glede. Jeg tenkte: Vil noen få det bedre hvis jeg går rett tilbake til hotellet mitt, ber mine bønner, skrifter for presten og lover aldri å la meg lede ut i fristelse igjen? Vil noen få det bedre om jeg blir ulykkelig? Og svaret kom med det samme: Nei. Ingen vil det. Det er ingen som vil bekymre seg, ingen vil bebreide meg, ingen vil velsigne meg for å ha vært snill pike, ingen vil straffe meg for å ha vært slem. Himmelen var tom. Jeg visste ikke om Gud hadde dødd, eller om det aldri hadde eksistert noen Gud. Uansett følte jeg meg fri og ensom. Om jeg var lykkelig eller ulykkelig visste jeg ikke, men noe veldig spesielt hadde skjedd. Og hele den enorme omveltningen kom mens jeg hadde den mersipanbiten i munnen, før jeg hadde svelget den engang. En smak - et minne - et jordskjelv...

Da jeg endelig svelget den og så på mannen på den andre siden av bordet, kunne jeg se at han visste at noe hadde skjedd. Jeg kunne ikke fortelle ham det der og da - det var fremdeles nesten for fremmed og privat for meg selv, til og med. Men senere spaserte vi en tur på stranden i mørket, og den varme nattebrisen rusket i håret mitt, og Atlanterhavet oppførte seg forbilledlig - bare små stillferdige bølger som vasket rundt trærne... Og jeg tok krusifikset av halsen og slengte det til havs. Det var det. Over og ut. Borte.

Så sånn var det jeg sluttet å være nonne."

- Den Mørke Materien, bok 3: "En Kikkert av Rav" (jeg har fjærnet navn for å legge i alle fall en LITEN demper på spoilerne her...)

Blue

This song fills me up with everything there is to be filled up with. Everything seems to make sense when I'm in the right mood to listen to this piece of spectacularly gorgeous music. Everything's seems OK. All the hurt and the joy and the strangeness and wonderfulness and just... Everything... It all makes sense. It's a winter song where the chords and harmonies melt together and tug at my heart. I first heard it during the winter of two years ago(it's the ending theme of the final episode of Cowboy Bebop). And I started just listening to it whenever I was on the bus or the tube, taking in view of the wintery landscape outside. There was a lot of snow that winter. The trees were completely covered in frost. Everything everywhere was white. Except for this amazingly pretty, clear, blue sky, which seemed to follow me wherever I went. Today, I got on a train. The weather was foggy and misty. But all of a sudden, the mist disappeared and the scenery opened itself up to me. The world was bright white, and the heavens were bright blue. I gave in to the beauty of this song, leaned close to the window and lost myself in the blue winter sky.

~

never seen a bluer sky
yeah, I can feel it reaching out
and moving closer
that's something about blue

asked myself what it's all for
and d'you know the funny thing about it?
I couldn't answer
no, I couldn't answer

things have turned a deeper shade of blue
and images that might be real
may be illusion
keep flashing off and on

free
wanna be free
gonna be free
and move among the stars
you know, they really aren't so far
feel so free
gotta know free
please, don't wake me from the dream
it's really everything it seemed

I'm so free
no black and white in the blue

everything is clearer now
life is just a dream, you know
that's never ending
I'm ascending

Fix you

when you try your best, but you don't succeed
when you get what you want, but not what you need
when you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
stuck in reverse

and the tears come streaming down your face
when you lose something you can't replace
when you love someone, but it goes to waste
could it be worse?

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and I will try to fix you

and high up above or down below
when you're too in love to let it go
but if you never try, you'll never know
just what you're worth

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and I will try to fix you

tears stream down your face
when you lose something you cannot replace
tears stream down your face
and I

tears stream
down your face
I promise you will learn from my mistakes
tears stream
down your face
and I

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and I will try to fix you

- Coldplay

Goodnight and go

~

skipping beats
blushing cheeks
I am struggling
daydreaming
bed scenes in
the corner café

and then I'm left in bits
recovering tectonic
tremblings
you get me every time

oh, why d'you have to be so cute?
it's impossible to ignore you
well, must you make me laugh so much?
it's bad enough we get along so well
say goodnight and go

follow you home
you've got your headphones on
and you're dancing
got lucky, beautiful shot
you're taking everything off
watch the curtains wide open

and you're following the same routine
flicking through the TV
relaxed and reclining
and you think you're alone

oh, why d'you have to be so cute?
it's impossible to ignore you
well, must you make me laugh so much?
it's bad enough we get along so well
say goodnight and go

one of these days
you'll miss your train
and come stay with me
(it's always say goodnight and go)
we'll have drink and
talk about things and
any excuse to stay awake with you
we could sleep here
I'd sleep there
but then the heating may be down again
(at my convenience)
we'd be good, we'd be great together

oh, why d'you have to be so cute?
it's impossible to ignore you
well, must you make me laugh so much?
it's bad enough we get along so well
say goodnight and go

oh, why's it always, always
goodnight and go?
oh, darling, not again
goodnight and go

- Imogen Heap

Nicest thing

~

all I know is that
you're so nice
you're the nicest thing I've seen
I wish that we could give it a go
see if we could be something
I wish I was your favourite girl
I wish you thought I was the reason you were in the world
I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile
I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style
I wish you couldn't figure me out
that you'd always wanna know what I was about
I wish you'd hold my hand when I was upset
I wish you'd never forget
the look on my face when we first met
I wish you had a favourite beauty spot that you loved secretly
'cause it was on a hidden bit that nobody else could see
basically, I wish that you loved me
I wish that you needed me
I wish that you knew, when I said two sugars,
actually, I meant three
I wish that without me your heart would break
I wish that without me you'd be spending
the rest of your nights awake
I wish that without me you couldn't eat
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep
look, all I know is that
you're the nicest thing I've ever seen
and I wish we could see if we could be something
yeah, I wish we could see if we could be something

- Kate Nash

Murder, he says

finally found a fella
almost completely divine
but his vocabulary
is killing this romance of mine
we get into an intimate situation
then begins this character's conversation

he says, "murder," he says
everytime we kiss
he says, "murder," he says
at a time like this
he says, "murder," he says
is that the language of love?

he says, "solid," he says
takes me in his arms
and says, "solid," he says
meaning all my charms
he says, "solid," he says
is that the language of love?

he says, "chick, chick, you torture me, zoom, are we living?"
I'm thinking of leaving him flat
he says, "dig, dig the jumps, the old ticker is giving,"
he can talk plainer than that

he says, "murder," he says
everytime we kiss
he says, "murder," he says
keep it up like this
and that "murder," he says
in that impossible tone
we'll bring on nobody's murder but his own

he says, "Jackson," he says
and my name's Marie
he says, "Jackson," he says
shoot the snoot for me
he says, "Jackson," he says
is that the language of love?

he says, "mmm-hmm,"
when he likes my hat
he says, "tsk, tsk, tsk,"
what the heck is that?
he says, "whoo-hooo," he says
is that the language of love?

he says, "hep, hep with helium, now babe, we're cooking,"
another expression's too ill
he says, "we're in the groove and the groove is good looking,"
sounds like his uppers don't fit

he says, "murder," he says
everytime we kiss
he says, "murder," he says
keep it up like this
and that "murder," he says
in that impossible tone
we'll bring on nobody's murder but his own

- Tori Amos (someone else wrote the song but I dunno who, so...)

Time flies

Small and scared and frail. And brave.

~

I sit tight
don't wanna miss the show
I hang on
don't wanna miss my prime
time will fly
upon my baby's back
time will fly
upon my baby's back

stay a while
my baby wants me to
don't you go
my baby begs me so
but tide will dry
upon my baby's back
tide will dry
upon my baby's back

I get weak
I get weary
I miss sleep
I get moody
I'm in thoughts
I write songs
I'm in love
I walk on

fingers crossed
my time is coming now
don't you go
my baby begs me so
time will fly
upon my baby's back
time will fly
upon my baby's back

and I get weak
I get weary
I miss sleep
I get moody
I'm in thoughts
I write songs
I'm in love
I walk on

I'm good I'm gone

working in the corner
peeking over shoulders
waiting for my time to come

working in the corner
one day to the other
butter on my piece of bun

stepping a stone and I'm all gone
give me the tone and I'm all gone
yeah, I'm walking by the line
not here, but in my mind

I'm working a sweat, but it's all good
I'm breaking my back, but it's all good
'cause I know I'll get it back
yeah, I know your hands will clap

and I'm working
yeah, I'm working
to make butter for my piece of bun

and if you say I'm not ok with miles to go
if you say there ain't no way that I could know
if you say I aim too high from down below
well, say it now, 'cause when I'm gone
you'll be calling, but I won't be at the phone

and I'm hanging around 'til it's all done
you can't keep me back once I had some
no wasting time to get it right
and you will see what I'm about

'cause I'm working a sweat, but it's all good
I'm breaking my back, but it's all good
'cause I know I'll get it back
yeah, I know your hands will clap

and if you say I'm not ok with miles to go
if you say there ain't no way that I could know
if you say I aim too high from down below
well, say it now, 'cause when I'm gone
you'll be calling, but I won't be at the phone

- Lykke Li

Breathe me

I feel this way far too often.

~

help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
hurt myself again today
and the worst part is there's no one else to blame

be my friend
hold me
wrap me up
unfold me
I am small
and needy
warm me up
and breathe me

ouch, I have lost myself again
lost myself and I am nowhere to be found
yes, I think that I might break
lost myself again and I feel unsafe

be my friend
hold me
wrap me up
unfold me
I am small
and needy
warm me up
and breathe me

Tea with cinnamon

wake again
to tea with cinnamon
some honey on a spoon
it is almost noon

walking down the stairs
to shed my morning tears
just can't be satisfied
lord knows that I've tried

and it's so beautiful
it's so beautiful
it's so beautiful
but it's not real
it's not real

ride the sun
the day is almost gone
I sit and drink champagne
I am very sane

smell this tea
and dream of what could be
defeated yet again
by tea with cinnamon
as many braver men
I might bounce back, my friend

and it's so beautiful
it's so beautiful
it's so beautiful
but it's not real
it's not real

now it's night
and I don't feel so bright
my pulse is beating fast
this will never last

another day is gone
and I can not outrun
the time is closing in
let the sleep begin
let it begin
let it begin

and it's so beautiful
it's so beautiful
it's so beautiful
but it's not real
it's not real

- Katzenjammer

Jag finns kvar

~

jag är en fråga utan svar
aldrig tydlig, aldrig klar
ingen knehund at klappa iblandt
og jag, tänker glömma alt ni sagt
jag ska sluta gå i takt, era drömmar
dom har aldri handlat om mig og mitt liv

och vad, är det som ni vil forstå?
ska ni resa er och gå,
om jag sager precis som det är?
och när ska nån fråga om jag vill
ha et liv der allt står still?
era drömmar finns inte kvar

för jag vil at verkligheten branns
jag vil känna hur det känns
att stå stadigt, när stormen tar fart
och de, som vill styra allt jag gör
det är just det som forstör
mina drömmar, men jag finns kvar

men du ser vad andra inte ser
att det finns så mycket mer
under ytan, som jag nestan glömt
hjälp mig att visa att jag kan
gå från pojke och til mann
att ta steget, och ändå förbli den jag är

andra drar mig lengre ner
jag ar inte den ni ser
jag forsökar å glömma
og fortsetta drömma ändå
era ord, era lögnar
ska jag aldrig mer lite på

för jag vil at verkeligheten branns
jag vil känna hur det känns
att stå stadigt, när stormen tar fart
och hur kan ni saga at jag ska
bli en sån som ni vil ha
utan drømmar? men jag finns kvar
jag är här, för jag finns kvar

- fra Treasure Planet, den svenske oversettelsen

Fairytale of New York

Det er første desember i dag, og mitt første innlegg i denne nye bloggen(og kjenner jeg meg selv rett kommer nok mitt andre og muligens også tredje allerede senere i dag). Jeg tenkte jeg kunne begynne denne EPISKE reisen med den vakreste julesangen jeg kjenner til, "Fairytale of New York" av The Pogues.

~



it was christmas eve, babe
in the drunk tank
an old man said to me
'won't see another one'
and then he sang a song
"the rare old mountain dew"
I turned my face away
and dreamed about you

got on the lucky one
came in eighteen to one
I've got a feeling
this year's for me and you
so happy christmas
I love you, baby
I can see a better time
when all our dreams come true

'they've got cars big as bars
they've got rivers of gold
but the wind blows right through you
it's no place for the old
when you first took my hand
on that cold christmas eve
you promised me,
broadway was waiting for me

you were handsome
you were pretty
queen of New York city
when the band finished playing
they howled out for more
Sinatra was swinging
all the drunks, they were singing
we kissed on a corner
then danced through the night

the boys of the NYPD choir
were singing "Galway Bay"
and the bells were ringing out
for christmas day

you're a bum, you're a punk
you're an old slut on junk
lying there, almost dead on a drip in that bed
you scumbag, you maggot
you cheap, lousy faggot
happy christmas, your arse
I pray God it's our last

the boys of the NYPD choir
were singing "Galway Bay"
and the bells were ringing out
for christmas day

I could have been someone
well, so could anyone
you took my dreams from me
when I first found you
I kept them with me, babe
I put them with my own
can't make it all alone
I've built my dreams around you

the boys of the NYPD choir
were singing "Galway Bay"
and the bells were ringing out
for christmas day